For the last four or five days I have felt my upper chest to be numb. I was fairly concerned about this. I asked the rehab lady if this was normal. She responded, "Yes. It means "it" is waking up."
I remembered how in my twenties and thirties it seemed like someone had given my heart and soul a huge shot of novocaine. I was pretty much "numb" to everything and everyone, with the possible exception of the students I taught. I guess what I'm saying is that numbness is precursor to waking up. Numbness then is perhaps a good sign.
The rehab lady said "waking up may take months." I think it takes a lifetime but that crisis, losses, transitions and change may be fast tracks to sloughing off the deep spiritual, emotional and mental sleep that I know I lapse back into from time to time and sometimes for a very long, long time.
I think often of the Persian poet Rumi's words, "...Don't go back to sleep..."
Question: What did it take to "wake" you up a little bit or a lot?
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That quote of Rumis reminds me of your conference in N.S.W. Australia, I attended and I heard you say that, Ask for what you really want ..dont go back to sleep and I recall that and still do today and I thought could I really ask for what I really want? and is that what happens if you dont, that you go back to sleep that you go back to being numb and back into the trance..
ReplyDeleteThat was a very powerful moment for me and your conference was just what I needed to hear, you speak..So I thank you for all that you have done in your own recovery and the healing that you have helped others with..in your lectures especially in your books...and I wish you the very best...and I say to you as you said to us all Ask for what you really want and dont go back to sleep. What is it your heart still desires ...what is it that you really want to say...keep writing we all love it..All the best
I don't know about waking up...I think it's more a change of perspective.When I was dx with breast cancer then bone metastasis 6 years ago it rocked my little world. Today, I continue the reality of staving off cancer cells as I continue with conventional medical treatments monthly.I also shed conventional dogmatic beliefs, people that drained me, and realized I had a voice in how I wanted my life to be.I opened my mind to alternative ways of healing the body, read enormous amounts of "woo-woo" books (lol) and listened with an inquisitive mind to the words and experiences of others.I became less of a snob in thinking only MY way was the RIGHT way of thinking.I became humbled by the love I received from a community of people that I KNEW within my heart space held my best interest to the highest good.The last book I read was the "Bioloby of Belief" by Dr.Bruce Lipton. I think you may find it helpful during your own recover process if you haven't already perused it.I've found that at the right time a book or person appears in my path when this student is ready to learn. Don't you? My desire for you is integration of the pieces you are discovering to make your heart a joyful place to reside in your chest cavity. Blessings, didi
ReplyDeleteOh my, blooper. The book is Biology of Belief. Didn't realize I had a review option before I submitted it or I would have corrected that. I've just signed up on the Google account so I could respond to you!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your comment and recommendation of the book. I will order it today and look forward to reading it. Thanks also for your support both of the blog and my own personal healing. Be well. John
ReplyDeleteYou are most welcome. Please do share what you've learned and your thoughts after reading it. I would be most interested in hearing them.
ReplyDeleteWell, BE!